first blog

2007-09-03T17:12:29+02:00

well, this is my first blog EVER and therefore, i dont know if im going to be very good at it. if im honest, this is about me getting my feelings out, not about being voted blogger of the year. i hope what i am writing is interesting to someone else and that people enjoy reading it.

i am currently enjoying my last day of freedom before i go back to school. although, there is a dark cloud hanging over me as i have suddenly realised that i am going to become a bit unstuck when my teachers ask me for the work i should have done months ago and promised i would do in the holidays.

this is the thing, a holiday is supposed to be a holiday isnt it. they can expect us to do work at weekends if we need to. i mean, technically its still term time, but we just dont go to school. i just cant believe how much work ive had to do this summer, not that ive really done any of it :S and thats not something im proud of either.

i wish i had the same enthusiasm as i used to when i was younger. i had such a long attention span. i would love to achieve and would be happy to put the work in. now, i dont mind winging it. i feel good when i do no work and still get an alright mark, even though if i did work i could get an amazing one. it so stupid. its like i cant focus at all anymore.

i just pray that i will get the focus back tht i used to have. i have such a good life, i just dont use it. i dont give mysel anytime ti sit back at look at it and realise how good i really have it. i like a challenge. and so i get involved with most things. but i get bored and so struggle to find the time to complete things because im not interested anymore.

i feel as though i dont have the passion for things that i used to. i get so fired up about something and am so excited to get involved. i put all this effort into getting involved in something but when i actually achieve that initial goal, its like the fire inside me goes out.

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